Wednesday, December 12, 2007


One of my co-workers said tonight, "You are the sweetest, kindest person I've ever met."

I smiled sweetly and thanked her, but inside I'm thinking, "You haven't met many people have you?". That isn't a slam on her, but rather, on myself. See, I know the real me and I don't think I'm very nice at all. I'm mean, sarcastic, feisty and downright nasty. And not just now and then, it is a constant fight within me. I mean, I want to be nice and sweet, well, part of me does. But then again, nice and sweet usually get a person trampled on.

Another co-worker (later on) mentioned that she had found how to donate money to the Woods family (the two daughters were killed at New Life Church on Sunday, their father is in the hospital). She said, "I gave $20. It isn't much, but I figure I don't know them so I won't send flowers, but my heart just broke when I heard what happened and I wanted to do something. It isn't much but it will help a little."

I have no idea if this woman knows Jesus, I don't know if she even thinks about her spiritual journey, but she went out of her way to donate to a family she doesn't know. That is kindness- pure and simple.

As a Christian, I should be kind in word and deed. I should anticipate needs and try to meet them. I should reach out to others and share with them, make their load easier to carry. Yet I often find myself shutting out the world, retreating into my own mean little cave. I hope that Jesus is still working to make the me that others see (that sweet, nice person) the me that I really am. Maybe someday the two will align more correctly. Until then, I'll just have to keep on keeping on, fighting against the meanies.

Leave me a comment and tell me if you struggle with this- or how you learned to be nice... I would love to hear from you!

1 comment:

MangyCat said...

I don't know that I would say nice and sweet gets one trampled. In all honesty, what does mean and nasty get you? Anything better?

I think you're being a mite hard on yourself (aren't we all?) in saying that you are so cold and hard. You have a good heart on the inside there, but maybe anger or frustration toward something else is getting in the way.

More than sweet and nice, maybe "kind" would be a better goal. Not that you aren't kind now, mind you, but perhaps it's hard to extend kindness to strangers--especially those driving around you. ;o)